The Miguel Velazquez Experience … Top Ten Reasons!

Top Ten Reasons Arizona Traded for Miguel ‘Clubhouse Cancer’ Velazquez
10. GM is bored.
9. GM is really bored.
8. Attendance is up and fans are demanding results … maybe Velazquez will punch-out some fans.
7. Joe Biden’s promised cure for cancer is imminent?
6. Chance for Josh Beckett to be ‘injured’ during a clubhouse brawl too good to pass up.
5. “Everyone loves cancer, what could possibly go wrong?”
4. Marketing opportunities for ‘V-inator’ merchandise.
3. Chance for manager Brett ‘Casual Fridays’ Butler to be injured during a ‘batting practice accident’ too good to pass up.
2. Owner thinks that someone from Puerto Rico counts as a ‘hometown player’.
1. “We’re 20-47 … what’s the worst that can happen, we lose 100+ games?”